PLEASANTRIES OF YOUR LIFE


PLEASANTRIES OF YOUR LIFE.

PLEASANTRIES OF YOUR LIFE


No Pleasantries
No Pleasantries (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
This is a short piece.  I haven’t written anything besides the script for the last two months, and my head is empty of imagery and illumination.  I got the script done as right as I could until such time as a more experienced screenwriter explains what I’ve missed. It’s like looking in the mirror and deflecting the flaws, until the big mirrored light swings over and all is revealed. .
Last Saturday after I printed the script out I went into a cocoon of pleasantries.  Studying my home-nested wild birds, nudge the bird feeder, peck each other out of order, eat alongside the chipmunk, the doves, and the squirrel on the porch and Rick, the pavement glory of La Posada waving from across the street as he jogged to retrieve a guest’s car.    I envied Loren on the porch, sunglasses and hat tipping slang narrating life as he sees it from a valet, go to guy,  perspective, and watching Rudy on the roof pitching leaves, and listening to Ray Baretto.   I drank up Gloria’s laughter at Geronimo when Sam Shepard sat next to me, and she nudged me to talk, talk talk. I watched the fireplace rising into flames and the sunlight at dusk in the melon room .I rose to morning air so fresh it numbed my tongue, my nose and eyes, and inside my San Francisco kimono, draping over my arms I could see the blossoms of color.
Lounging in lavender and lilac oil, soaps and salts in my claw foot tub listening to Nancy Wilson and then later with the TV on to TCM and my head on the pillow, I snuggled the pleasantry of a warm bed and heat rising through the vents.
If you write down the pleasantries
Surrounding your life
Your blessings rise up and
Give you comfort.
The sweet peace may vanish the next day, or be intercepted by the news, a wreck in the street, an unexpected phone call. The crossroads of everyday life comes and goes. Between all of these uncontrollable incidents we are writing our stories. Stories that some day will be told in conversation, or written in journals and books. The essence of our changing lives is worth telling, so you loyal readers write to me and tell me yours.

 

Remember your pleasantries, and the ones that swim through your days, with smiles and laughter, pats on the backs, jokes and tales. We all have clutter of the mind but we have the power to sift out the deranged deviations. I have come to believe the only will I want is the power to be a real good sifter.

 


.

COMFORT & GANGSTERS


Comfort….
From writing by hand at my tiny Eurasian desk facing the window to the west; framed by time and familiarity into the branches of JD’s pine tree, the black silky toned crows basking like prowesses on the branches, and waiting for La Posada to empty the day’s leftovers in the garbage cans. The silky drape of the winter sky sometimes adorned with lacy clouds, like today, softening the southwest blue to a faded jeans shade. From my desk, I write, without thoughts predefined, just a drain of emotional threads from my heart…

This year isn’t like last year, the absentee man, fussing with the fireplace, making me afternoon espresso, or drying dishes. It is not at all like last year, with Rudy and John intercepting my division of attention, laughing at the kitchen table, eating my blueberry pancakes.

I had the song of Judy Garland’s rainbow in my heart. It was a time I will never forget, or regret, because I was a very lucky lady for several years. Unabridged ecstasy poured out of body, and spread over my attitude, abundant spirit, mood, facial expressions, and my dreams were filled with amusement instead of nightmares.

That’s why now, is so different. The camp has closed, and I wander into these new woods unsteady, and steadier, juxtaposed between, acceptance and anger.

In the last few months, I’ve written my heart out, read Shepard, Colette, Durrell and my Creative nonfiction magazines. I’ve studied, and prepared for radio programs, and collected a bundle of columns to adapt into short stories. I started buying chocolates and jelly beans, so I treat myself, on breaks, when it’s too cold for my frail body to walk around town or up Palace Avenue to see the new for sale listings.

My steps inward resulted in accomplishments, break-troughs’ and a comedic sideshow trying to open boxes, make repairs, until Rudy shows up again, and rake the leaves, stuff that is mundane. More distant relations, and mafia threaded strangers knocked on my door, bolstering my faith in breaking the silence that ruled me, I let rule me.  Stepping inside the truth I must face isn’t nearly as harmful as pretending.

Mob on television, in the news, (gross sales global figure of $850 billion) websites, and bloggers, movies and books. They’re all coming out of the closet to inform, turn themselves in, give advice, consult on their own films, sign on for pubic speaking at Library’s, documentaries, and advertisements-the world is all mobbed up and it’s time for some horrific homogenization of the gangsters who wouldn’t break the silence.

SEND WINTER CLOTHES


Hurricane Sandy Redecoration
Hurricane Sandy Redecoration (Photo credit: dakine kane)

A Desperate Plea For Winter Clothes

The owners of New Jersey’s NJ Skateshop are desperately trying to collect winter clothes for neighbors without heat and members of their community who were left homeless by Hurricane Sandy, as a Nor’easter is forecast to hit the stricken area next week.

Co-owner Chris Nieratko reports two of the shop’s four stores have electricity and have been stocked with power strips to allow residents to charge their phones and “pretend things were normal if only for a while.” But many are ill-equipped to handle the incoming storm, he writes, and are already struggling: “Seeing your children cold and hungry is a feeling I never want any of you to experience.”

Nieratko is asking for shipments of any winter clothing to the store’s New Brunswick location, from which they will distribute to people in need:

I have no TV so I don’t know what you’re hearing on the news, but let me tell you, it’s bad. Very bad..we’ve opened to the door to anyone with children. For days we ran generators sparingly because there was no gas…

There’s another storm coming. Temperatures are dropping. Things are getting colder and even scarier. I am writing to you to ask for your help in clothing the displaced, homeless, under-dressed skaters in our community and their families…If you have anything warm (socks, sweatshirts, jackets, beanies, gloves, shoes, tees, ANYTHING) doesn’t matter if it’s 5 seasons ago…there are many in need from very young to very big XXL. Anything you can spare to help people stay warm will be appreciated.

Please send whatever you’re able to (and there’s no box too small) to our New Brunswick shop:

NJ TWO 29-B Easton Ave

New Brunswick, NJ 08901

Label the box HURRICANE RELIEF

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10:45 AM – Today

National Guard, South Beach

Photo of National Guard in South Beach, Staten Island, today.

hurricane

Deer Park-North Babylon Park Patch reports:

Harold Jamison will make it to the Tanger Outlet center this afternoon to see Ben Affleck’s “Argo.””That movie is so good, I have to see it. I’m not missing it. It’s about the 1979 Iran conflict and there is old TV video clips and everything,” Jamison said.

But first, he was living his own 1970s-style flashback, a nearly three-hour wait to get gas in Deer Park in the wake of Hurricane Sandy.

Jamison was in line to get gas at the Deer Park Express station on the corner of Deer Park and Long Island avenues. He was still idling around the corner on Lake Avenue and E. 4th Street. In 90 minutes, he had moved two blocks.

Read the full story, and check out Mark’s excellent “Sweet Daddy” jacket on Deer Park-North Babylon Park Patch.

HuffPost’s Sam Stein reports:

WASHINGTON — Before hitting the campaign trail for his final swing before the election, President Barack Obama on Saturday stopped by the headquarters of the Federal Emergency Management Agency in Washington for a briefing on Hurricane Sandy recovery efforts.

“We still have a long way to go to make sure that the people of New Jersey, Connecticut, New York and some of the surrounding areas get their basic needs taken care of and we get back to normalcy,” Obama said, adding that the situation continues to be his “number one priority.”

The president emphasized five components of recovery: getting power back on as quickly as possible, pumping water out of flooded areas, making sure people’s basic needs are taken care of, debris removal and getting transportation systems up and running again.

“Our hearts continue to go out to those families who have been affected, who have actually lost loved ones,” Obama said. “That’s obviously heartbreaking. But I’m confident that we will continue to make progress as long as state and local and federal officials stay focused.”/blockquote>

Read more here.

OurAmazingPlanet reports:

With coastal communities in New York and New Jersey still reeling from the devastation caused by Hurricane Sandy, the last thing the area needs is another storm. But that’s exactly what it might get.

A nor’easter is predicted to potentially hit the East Coast next Wednesday (Nov. 7), and beach erosion experts are concerned about further damage to shorelines devastated by Sandy.

Read the full story here.

9:55 AM – Today

How You Can Volunteer Today In NY

HuffPost’s Tom Zeller reports:

There’s no question that an event like Sandy will have insurers adjusting their actuarial tables. Estimates on the amount of damages in the wake of this week’s storm vary, but all are well into the tens of millions. …

Whatever the ultimate value, climate science suggests in broad terms that a warming planet will likely produce more muscular storms, as well as increased heat waves, droughts, higher-precipitation in some areas, and other weather events that have clear implications for the long-term viability of the insurance industry.

Read the full story here.

9:04 AM – Today

No Fix Date For The L Train

quasimado @ quasimado : MTA official on the L train: The tunnel there is flooded from wall to wall, ceiling to ceiling… it’s going to take awhile. #noo
8:44 AM – Today

Obama’s Remarks At FEMA

Per the White House Press Office:

 

 

THE PRESIDENT: Well, listen, I just completed not only a meeting with our team here at FEMA and all of our Cabinet officers who are involved in the recovery process along the East Coast, but we also had a conference call with the governors of Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, as well as many of the municipalities who have been directly affected by this crisis and this tragedy.

We still have a long way to go to make sure that the people of New Jersey, Connecticut, New York, and some of the surrounding areas get their basic needs taken care of and that we start moving back to normalcy.

A couple of things that we’ve emphasized: Number one, that it is critical for us to get power back on as quickly as possible. And just to give people an example of the kind of work we’re doing — the military, DOD, thanks to the work of Leon and others, have been able to get military transport facilities to move cherry-pickers and personnel from as far away as California to get that equipment into the area so we can start getting some of the power back on as quickly as possible. It is a painstaking process, but we’re making progress.

Number two, we’re getting assets in to pump as much water out as possible. Lower Manhattan obviously is a particularly acute example, but there are problems with flooding that are affecting substations throughout the region. That’s going to continue to be a top priority.

 

Number three, making sure that people’s basic needs are taken care of. As we start seeing the weather get a little bit colder, people can’t be without power for long periods of time, without heat for long periods of time. And so what we’re doing is starting to shift to identify where we can have temporary housing outside of shelters so people can get some sense of normalcy. They can have a hot meal; they can have the capacity to take care of their families as their homes are being dealt with.

 

Number four, debris removal still important. Number five, making sure that the National Guard and other federal assets are in place to help with getting the transportation systems back up and running — that’s going to be critical.

 

What I told the governors and the mayors is what I’ve been saying to my team since the start of this event, and that is we don’t have any patience for bureaucracy, we don’t have any patience for red tape, and we want to make sure that we are figuring out a way to get to yes, as opposed to no, when it comes to these problems.

 

The other thing I emphasized, though, is that it is much easier for us to respond if we know what these problems are out in these areas, so if everybody can help publicize the number 800-621-FEMA — 800-621-FEMA — then individuals can register with FEMA and immediately get the assistance that they need.

 

And so the more that folks in New Jersey, New York and Connecticut understand that there are a lot of resources available for them, not just with respect to housing, but also with respect to childcare, medicine, a whole range of support, then we want to make sure that they contact us as soon as possible if they’re in distress because help is available.

Let me just close by saying this: Obviously we’ve now seen that after the initial search and rescue, the recovery process is difficult and it’s painful. But the governors at the local level — Governors Christie, Cuomo, and Malloy — they are working around the clock, their teams are working around the clock. We are incredibly grateful to the heroism and hard work of our first responders, many of whom themselves have had their homes flooded out. Our hearts continue to go out to those families who have been affected and who have actually lost loved ones — that’s obviously heartbreaking.

But I’m confident that we can continue to make progress as long as state, local and federal officials stay focused. And I can assure you everybody on this team, everybody sitting around the table has made this a number-one priority and this continues to be my number-one priority.

There’s nothing more important than us getting this right. And we’re going to spend as much time, effort and energy as necessary to make sure that all the people in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut know that the entire country is behind them in this difficult recovery effort. We are going to put not just 100 percent, but 120 percent behind making sure that they get the resources they need to rebuild and recover.

 

8:43 AM – Today

Cuomo: Free Gas To Be Distributed

From the AP:

New York’s governor says the U.S. Department of Defense will set up emergency mobile fuel stations around the New York City metro area.

Free gasoline will be distributed, with a 10-gallon per-person limit.

The announcement was made Saturday at a briefing by Gov. Andrew Cuomo.

FlightStats.com has issued a report stating that from October 27th to November 1st in North America alone, 20,254 flights were canceled due to Hurricane Sandy. Roughly 9,978 flights were canceled at New York area airports alone.

United stands as the airline with the most cancellations by Sandy (2,149), followed by JetBlue (1,469), US Airways (1,454), Southwest (1,436), Delta (1,293) and American (759). In an examination of weather events over the past seven years, Sandy comes in second in terms of total number of cancelled flights, behind the North American Blizzard of February 2010 (22,441 flights).

quasimado @ quasimado : Cuomo: 80 percent of NYC subway system restored.

From AP:

Even with her Coney Island apartment squarely in the path of Superstorm Sandy, Loraine Gore was staying put. At age 90, she said, she had her reasons.

“I’m tired,” she told a friend who urged her to evacuate. “I don’t want to go.”

After floodwaters subsided, Gore’s body was found face-down in her home – one of nearly a dozen New Yorkers over the age of 65 who perished in the storm.

Read the full story here.

Fire powered cell phone chargers being sold in downtown Manhattan. twitpic.com/b9tz8y

NYGovCuomo @ NYGovCuomo : Governor Cuomo Announces Deployment of Temporary Fuel Trucks Throughout the Region http://t.co/w9azV2wN

From The Associated Press:

Motorists in 12 northern New Jersey counties will be allowed to buy gasoline just every other day under an order by Gov. Chris Christie that takes effect at noon Saturday.

Christie says he wants to ease long lines and extended wait times at gas stations and prevent a fuel shortage in the state hard-hit by Superstorm Sandy.

Read the whole story here.

HuffPost blogger Rep. Ed Markey writes:

Information, in advance of storms and to aid relief after, plays a critical role. That is why both NOAA and FEMA must have the resources they need to protect families.

As Gov. Chris Christie mentioned in remarks this week, the loss of life could have been much worse. No one took Sandy lightly, as early warning and real time information derived from NOAA’s satellites and forecasts saved lives.

This is a perfect example of the dangers of Rep. Paul Ryan’s (R-Wisc.) budget proposal. That short-sighted scheme would cut $250 million from the NOAA’s satellite program, crippling our weather prediction capability. NOAA ran an analysis in 2011 that found without data from the satellite closest to the end of its shelf life, the accuracy of its forecasts for major storms like blizzards and hurricanes would decrease by approximately 50 percent.

That’s the difference between knowing the storm will bring heavy rain or cause a flash flood and would place lives at risk.

Read the full blog post here.

ASPCA @ ASPCA : NYC ALERT: 24-hour hotline for evacuees to report pets who need rescue! **347-573-1561** #sandypets Please RT
NBCPhiladelphia @ NBCPhiladelphia : After the #INGNYCM was canceled, @Philly_Marathon offers marathoners a race to run if they raise money for charity. http://t.co/WKNWbpoy
9:21 PM – 11/ 2/2012

CNN: U.S. Death Toll Over 100

BreakingNews @ BreakingNews : CNN puts US death toll from Superstorm Sandy at 106 – @CNN http://t.co/00351ytV

HuffPost’s Alice Hines and Mark Gongloff report:

At 3 p.m. on the Friday after Hurricane Sandy hit New York City, the St. Jacobi church in Sunset Park, Brooklyn, was overflowing with boxes of water bottles, piles of clothes and volunteers baking bread pudding. The mood was busy and hopeful as 350 people helped sort donations from across Brooklyn to be sent out to neighborhoods like Staten Island and Far Rockaway that were devastated by the storm.

But one key element was missing: gasoline.

“We have a lot of everything right now,” said Diana Aguinaga, a dental hygienist who was volunteering at the donation hub, a joint effort of 350.org and Occupy Wall Street. “What we really need is a car with gas.” Outside the church, there were about 15 parked drivers loading and unloading supplies, though not all of them had enough gas in their tank to go as far as was needed.

Read the full story here.

HuffPost’s Ben Hallman reports:

On Thursday afternoon, firemen set up a few grills near an intersection here and cooked burgers for hungry residents in this beach community devastated by Hurricane Sandy.

On Friday afternoon, the grills were gone. The firemen were now training a hose on a row of businesses and homes around the corner that had burned down at the height of the storm. The only lunch option for those in need was a small pile of packaged goods dumped in a unappetizing heap on the dirty ground near a crowded mobile phone charging station set up by police. The nearest hot meal was more than a mile away, past the smoldering ruins, at an intersection where Ajay Singh and three other Sikh men from Queens had come of their own initiative to dole out steaming bowls of rice and beans and toasted bread made in their church kitchen.

Read the full story here.

8:15 PM – 11/ 2/2012

Fighting Hinders Recovery Process In NJ

HuffPost’s Jaweed Kaleem and Lucas Kavner report:

Waiting in a 45-minute line Friday morning at a Hess gas station in Center Moriches, Long Island, to fill up a portable fuel tank, Chip Daniel noticed sudden a flurry of police cars surrounding the station. He heard shouts and stomping, and the groaning of drivers in the packed crowd of cars in what is becoming an increasingly familiar scene at New York and New Jersey gas stations in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.

“There was some jackass trying to cut the line and they called the cops. Four police cars came up to him and he began arguing with the police,” said Daniels, 44. “It took them some time, but finally he went back to his own spot.”

Read the full story here.

7:49 PM – 11/ 2/2012

Why The Marathon Was Called Off

HuffPost’s Katie Bindley and Bonnie Kavoussireport:

The show was supposed to go on. Mayor Michael Bloomberg said in a midday press conference Friday that the ING New York City Marathonwould lift New Yorkers’ spirits following the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, much like it did after the Sept. 11 attacks in 2001.But the anti-marathon backlash rose Friday as the death toll in New York reached 41, the city’s the transit system remained crippled and the storm’s economic damage was estimated at $50 billion. The marathon’s starting line was to have been on hard-hit Staten Island, where homes and lives were lost this week.

Read more here

WHY I LOVE MEN


Why I love men Part  3

I think of men as the solid substance in my life; the ones I’ve loved have always

Little Dreamer (Negazione album)

acted as guidance counselors to my wavering fluid steps through the maze of decisions. If you’re a dreamer like I am, you know what I am talking about. We live in a blurred world of reality and what we imagine and the lines are blurry.  It’s easy to cross-over to imagination and where that leads us can be more dangerous than the actual occurrence of events.

THEN… THE PHONE RANG


All photos: Waldemar Kalinowski

David Manzanares on the set of Sweetwater: Noah and Logan Miller.

The first time I met David Manzanares was when I rented my home to the Brothers film crew. He eased me through the process, which was a big deal that cold winter when I was living alone. I had Sam Shepard, Jake Gyllenhall, Toby McGuire and Natalie Portman all in the house.

I’m not sitting in a hotel lobby or a restaurant scribbling notes about the clothes my interview subject is wearing or how he acts in a natural setting because the interview wasn’t planned. It just happened one morning in August, while I was having coffee and watching the wild birds on the back porch, when the phone rang.

“Hello.”

“LouLou, its David Manzanares.”

“David! How are you?”

“I’m doing great….yea, very busy.” David’s sleepy slow tone beckoned the beginning of an effortless conversation.

“How’bout you?”

He listened attentively, only interjecting the flip side of my struggles to interweave what course his life had taken.

“I’ve not seen you since the Brothers shooting.” I said.

“What was that? Two years ago?”

“Yea, time is racing, but I love every minute. I wake up and look out the window, and thank God for my good fortune… the happiness.”

“I think of you as one of the most fulfilled men in Santa Fe.”

He chuckled, “That’s what everyone thinks.”

“It’s true isn’t it?” I shot back.

“I’ve been to hell and back.”

“You?”

“Oh yea. But very few know. It was a year ago.”

“Afterwards, everything became clearer; how to live in both worlds with my family and a film career.”

While I wandered from the kitchen to the back porch, David confided in me. I listened to the private life of a notoriously loved and admired local boy who climbed the tricky trail to Hollywood.  David began a career in music in 1997 at the Santa Fe Bandstand playing his new Latin music on his guitar. In 2006 he hit the Billboard in the Latin Genre and went on to producing music for television and film. His song “Rocky Mountain Man” was in the film Brothers.  David supplemented his music with a job as a location scout, a natural for a boy raised in Abiquiu. He walked the line of family tradition and modernism during his teens.

“What are you doing now?”

“Which day? I go to Abiquiu Tuesday, no Wednesday, then to scout some locations, then the following week I start shooting.”

“David, are you happy?”

“Yes, very very happy.  I mean that I love what I’m doing, and everyday I wake up excited. You’ll get there with your passion for life.”

“David, would you be interested in … maybe a print interview?”

“About what?”

“You silly.”

A few days later I wrote up my questions, and sent them to him. He assured me he would make time, between studying his lines for the highly anticipated Miller Brothers Film, Sweetwater, and scouting a location for a reality show.

THE INTERVIEW

Q: “How does it feel being inside the desired creative environment of film and acting?”

A: “It has been, and continues to be an incredible journey.  Sometimes it’s surreal.  I read a script – jump into locations or acting and voila – months later it’s on the big screen.  It’s very rewarding to be a part of a creative, collaborative effort.”

Q:“Has it changed you?”

A:Yes, it has given me the gift of doing something I truly love.  I have always lived a creative life, whether it’s writing or performing music; acting or even reading a script and bringing a creative touch to the locations.  I guess it’s changed me in my appreciation for things and it has opened up new and exciting opportunities.

Q: “What have been the life lessons from your work that you’ve used in your own life?”

A:Ah, the life of living on the hot seat.  I have acquired the ability to go with the flow and be ready to shift in a moment’s notice.   There is no prediction.  It changes in a heartbeat.  It’s taught me humility, patience and most importantly, appreciation.  Both music and production are a constantly changing life force.  I find myself grounded by my family.  They are my anchor.  My ship tends to sail all over the ocean and my family is a safe harbor from where I draw strength and support.

Q:What do you want our readers to know about Santa Fe, that they may not know?

A:Santa Fe is a multi-cultural, very accepting and unique place.  It truly is the City Different on so many levels.  There are people and places that constantly add to the texture of Santa Fe and to my life, personally. It’s great to see your city through the eyes of the world, the very creative world, and that’s a gift in itself.

Q:Who in the film business inspires you?

A:That’s a tough question. From an actor’s standpoint, I would say Alan Rickman.  He truly is a most inspiring actor.  I watched him portray a terrorist in Die Hard to Professor Snape in Harry Potter to the Colonel in Sense & Sensibility.  Talk about range.  He is one of the most outstanding, subtle and profound actors in the industry.

Q: What is it like to be on a team of accomplished creative  people?

A” The past 25 years, I have worked with the most accomplished, directors, producers and actors. I get to work with the best crews, the best people in the best state.  Each project brings a new inspiration, perspective and creativity.  Right now, the project I’m working on is “Sweetwater” with the Miller brothers – Noah & Logan.  Wow – their energy and creativity is awesome.  I am always inspired – musically – creatively by all the departments from the Production Designer to Locations to Hair & Make Up & Wardrobe and everyone else.     It is such a team effort to bring any project to the big screen.  It’s awe-inspiring!

I work in Locations and that alone is one of the most creative departments.  I get a script or storyboard and have to match the scenes with locations in New Mexico.  Talk about challenging.    Sometimes the story line calls for a specific location and I get to interpret it and create it.  I have been with Ghost Ranch as their production manager since 1988.  The light alone can create something amazing.

Some days I feel like the most fortunate woman in the world to live in Santa Fe. Today is one of them. From my porch I can see a bubblegum pink sunset, filtering through the trees, and the leaves are warming up like dancers in a soft breeze. I’m playing the dreamy music of Madeleine Peyroux when I notice my friend Pauline from La Posada Resort across the street.  “Missy, you’re playing one of my favorites.” I wave back and sink further into the bliss of this quirky, dawdling little village of inspiriting locals.

WHY I LOVE MEN


Once again after a lengthy and gushing nourishment of his body and mind, I return to this mask of myself. Sunken eyes and droopy cheeks; a hollowness that overwhelms the spirit.

The insomnia of separation from a man’s thunder.  When his shoulder hooks my head, and tweaks my worries like soft bread. The mind that directs me when I am driving directionless, and maps my journey, and to walk beside me, a guardian of my fragility. The voice that encourages me, and applauds my success, rather than let it drip from jealously or preoccupation.

More to come.

How the laughter erupts in a moment of spontaneous passion.

My observation of his secret revealed, unknowingly.

The gestures of him shaving, and the modest vanity after I re-wardrobe him.

Feeling his eyes in a crowd, undressing or admiring me, for some folly or  expression.

The humor he finds in my misguided attempts to open bottles, and packages with a dull spoon,

and figure out electronics.

How he will pardon and pamper my unwarranted fears of stalkers, misplacing my Progressive Prada glasses,  and falling down the slippery wooden stairs.

The man whose balance evens my wrinkles.

Let’s the light into my eyes.

Opens my shell with wonder and tenderness.

WHY I write this is because the danger of reversing the purest form of love is tempting me. This dragon argues with me for dressing up, for believing in love, for wanting romance, for giving the guy next to me a chance, and  for dating.  She tries to stop me from waving at neighbors, for whistling winds of change, hope, and all those iridescent rainbows I lived with my man, and now are like submarine weights to lift each day.

It’s like taking down the Christmas Ornaments, and returning to the blemishes of winter.

Yes, the dragon sees me in the mirror, and maybe you, but we cannot allow her to trample over our feminine skin.

 

ART OF BAR WRITING


ART OF BAR WRITING.

ART OF BAR WRITING


SANTA FE, NM

It was just 3 in the afternoon, and I’d returned from a trip to San Diego, and my body craved relaxation, but not in the house, where suitcases remained unpacked, and dishes to be washed.  I walked down to La Fonda Hotel and sat at a table in the woodsy and old leather bar.  The smell of tequila and chips permeates the room, so I flowed with the

ambiance and ordered guacamole and a margarita. Sipping slowly, I took notice of the other people around me; old men in Spanish colonial chairs staring into the hotel activity, the reception desk staff, fudging with room reservations, and the lovely waiter, who bowed each time he came to my table. I hadn’t planned on thinking about the script I’m working on, and just as I was unwinding my limbs from the plane ride and trip from Albuquerque, ideas started boiling up like bubbles about this script. I panicked because I didn’t have my journal, or even a pen.   Ah! the gift shop.. …

” Do you have a writing pad?”

“What kind?”

“With lines.”

” We have a few.”

” I’m in a hurry, anything will do.”

” What’s the rush?”

” I’m a writer,”

” Oh, I get it.” The clerk rushed through the transaction, and as I was about to leave I remembered,  

” And a pen.”

She handed me the one she was writing with, and off I went.

Seated with my tools, I scribbled the thoughts as fast as they entered my still sober self, and when I finished, I took to writing about my surroundings.  Yes, this is a place to bar write. I’ve observed Sam Shepard in several places writing through a meal. He has the distinction of not being bothered, but if he is, he draws a line around his space with his power pupils, one glance, and you’re blown off his planet. Sam does not always  position his power pupils to defer interruption, I’ve seen him put his pen down and engage the stranger. His eyes turn to a likeness of the Mustang horse, wild and waiting for tenderness.

 You have to practice this art, because invariably someone will ask if you are a writer, if you are published, and then they tell you they want to be a writer too.  I don’t have power pupils so I put on my head-set and if necessary place  my phone to the ear, if I am in the middle of a superlative sentence that I cannot stop.  You also have to monitor your drinking, because I’ve learned more than one glass, is not going to read like it did while you were drinking.  

 

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU’RE BROKE


Don't Go Broke. After the War Buy More War Bon...
Don’t Go Broke. After the War Buy More War Bonds – NARA – 534094 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Eat less, drink more, and write. I know that’s bad advise. It’s mine.  We have to own how we absorb the tumbles and falls. We all have them. I mean, there is no answer, no universal answer, or political party, that will bring you to that point.

You just have to find the path that you belong on.Mine is all about gambling.

I love to be tested. Isn’t that crazy?

If I had known that I was seated next to the Mafia Boss of Los Angeles, then I would have listened with sharpened ears, and repeated bits of explosive headline blood curdling stories to my girlfriends. That would have placed myself, my father and my friends in jeopardy. An informant from the government may tag me on the way home from school, or tag one of my friends, or an enemy of the Boss, may pick me up from school and not bring me back. Everyone is suspect: an informant, or weak enough to become an informant, a loose lipped wise guy, a bragging connected businessman, a friend of a friend, a cousin of a brother, and a daughter of a gangster. We are all potential targets of this organization known as the Mafia, Mob, syndicate, Costa Nostra, or our thing. Growing up in this circle of gamblers, killers, fixers, enforcers, bookies was like growing up in a novel, it was a fictional tale all the way, until the end of my father’s life. There is a drop down board that appears every time I write about our family business that reads, “ How dare you open my life to the world, what do you know? You know nothing little sweetheart, and that’s the way I planned it. “ “There’s no such thing as the Mafia! If you ever mention that word again, you’re leaving this house!” I melted down to the floor, and he was ominous as God standing over me. I would never mention the word again, I promised, and I would never believe in the Mafia. So, I became a writer of our secret interior life.