WRITING MY WAY HOME.


This is a previous post (2011) that I am re posting for new readers. MY FAMILY  history was brought to life in an unpublished memoir.   The stories lived on during a long arduous journey of research and trying to get published.   Sometimes I read pages to get close to my parents.  I squeeze in between […]

WHY WRITE


Dad used to say, the only thing I have to show for my life, is you. Just cause I write doesn’t mean that I have something to say, that isn’t already known. I write for everyone that feels something different, and no one wants to listen.  It’s my life. Dad in Beverly Hills Court. On […]

CESAER’S SALAD


I moved in with my Dad when I was thirteen years old.  My mother had just passed away, and I arrived with innocence and untrained cooking skills.  Mom was an Irish Catholic meatloaf and corn-beef cook.  Dad was a Russian Orthodox raised  moderate vegetarian, and decided to hire a chef to teach me how to […]

THE COLOR RED IS THE COLOR BLUE


  I have to turn the clock back to 1996, to the days of peeling back the first layer of family history. I was sitting at a dining room table in a casita in Taos, NM.  It was winter, the first time I’d lived in snow outside a few teenage weekends in Arrowhead. Snow silence […]

WHY DEL MAR


I am a diarist. I record life around me so I can understand, as if by understanding I will find peace. Recording the exaggerated emotion and incidents of life began as a young girl when my mother gave me a diary.  A good storyteller has to live life differently than the rest of us; otherwise, […]

THE SIEGEL SMILEY LEGACY


When I was eleven, our home burnt to the ground in the Bel Air fire, and everything we owned burned to ash. Shortly after my mother moved us to an apartment in Brentwood, a mammoth carton arrived and was placed in the center of the living room. My mother cut it open and urged me […]

MY FATHER, THE GENTLE GANGSTER


This is an excerpt from the memoir I’ve been working on many years. The first manuscript was 800 pages; about three of them were worth reading. The book mutated about 2000 times. “What’s it like knowing your father is a gangster? Did you know when you were a teenager? Did your father kill anyone? Did […]